Dharmist in Progress

"Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." ~ Einstein

Pools of Sorrow, Waves of Joy

on January 7, 2013

…are drifting through my open mind, possessing and caressing me.”

– the Beatles, Across the Universe

It’s difficult to be different.

I don’t mean to tell you the theme of pretty much every ’80s movie.  It really is difficult to be different.

A vegetarian in a carnivorous family.  A nerd who’s dropped out of three colleges.  A Hindu in the Bible Belt.

I’ve never “fit in.”  I’m not that kind of person.  I am unlike anyone I’ve ever met, and proud of it.

However, sometimes things happen that remind me.

My husband was popular in high school.  He was smart, good at sports, and a geek, so he literally got along with everyone.

I was…not.  I’ve found it incredibly difficult to balance a need to belong with being true to myself, and it’s still a daily struggle.

Sometimes you have to choose between giving honest, necessary advice, and telling people what they want to hear.  My new year’s resolution was and is to always do the former.  It’s already blown up in my face at least twice, but I stand by my decision.

I’m not going to lie to my loved ones and myself, in a desperate (and ineffective) attempt at saving them from reality.

There’s a difference between a positive outlook and denying reality.  Denying reality is unhealthy, and really just makes everything worse.

And so, if anyone finds me offensive, it’s just part of the package.  There is no honor in faking a smile when a frown is the next step forward.


Sorry for the random soul searching posts this week.  Hopefully the next post I make will be on topic again.



One response to “Pools of Sorrow, Waves of Joy

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